Why Solange’s Outburst Isn’t Funny

Hey there, blog-o-sphere! Sorry I’ve been a little MIA—I was trying to finish the final papers of my master’s degree! Anywho, that’s over now with graduation coming on Friday, so I’ve decided to take some time to chime in on a recent social media frenzy. Admittedly, I had not seen the Jay Z/Solange Knowles video until about an hour ago. I had no want to watch it, and to be honest, when I first saw someone post it yesterday, I assumed it was fake. Alas, it wasn’t, and after watching it this morning, I paused it at 36 seconds because I didn’t need to see anymore. If you have yet to see it and are going to continue reading, you might want to see the clip here: http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/solange-knowles-kicks-punches-claws-jay-z-met-gala-after-party-article-1.1789023

Even after watching it, I wasn’t sure I was going to say anything. After seeing my friend Andrew’s Facebook status on the same subject this morning, I decided to weigh in on the topic myself. As with any hot button topic, the Twitterverse took off after the video went viral yesterday. #WhatJayZSaidToSolange was trending for hours, with people making up—I’ll admit it—some really witty responses to what the rap mogul might have said to Beyonce’s B-List baby sister that led to her going off on him.

So why blog about it? It’s been covered by all kinds of media outlets since the video broke, so why would some small-time blogger take it on? Why? Because what she did isn’t funny. Where my friend Andrew comes in is in the question he posed this morning: “Why is nobody putting Solange on the chopping block?” Why do we make it okay for a woman to go off on a man like that—hitting, punching, yelling, etc—but if Jay had done it to her, he’d have already had to make a public apology? We didn’t laugh when Chris Brown broke Rihanna’s face. We didn’t laugh when Ike repeatedly beat Tina. So why are we laughing now?

Solange punches, slaps, yells, and kicks at Jay in that video (I went on and watched the whole thing so I didn’t sound uninformed). Even after being restrained by a massive bodyguard, she still yells and kicks and tries to get away from him to go back at Jay for the duration of their ride. Near the end, she ends up getting right back in his face, and he pushes her away before the bodyguard intervenes again. As they go to exit the elevator, Jay moves to let her go first, and she goes at him a third time, bringing everyone back into the elevator to stop it.

So why isn’t it funny? Because domestic violence isn’t a freaking joke. I’m not going to sit here and say Jay Z was innocent of saying something rude to her, but I want to stand up and applaud him for not giving into her display. Now wait, before you chastise me and say “WELL A MAN SHOULD NEVER HIT A WOMAN!” No shit, Sherlock, but what makes it okay for her to hit him like that? Nothing. Nothing makes that okay. And Jay—whether he was thinking of the media or is just genuinely a decent human being—had the forethought to let the bodyguard do his job and restrain Solange. Even when she got around the bodyguard and hit him again, he simply pushed her away. He didn’t slap her back. He didn’t knock her block off. Why? I’m going to guess it’s because even with those 3.5 full minutes of her going HAM on him, he knew that if he’d hit her back, those 3.5 minutes of abuse from her wouldn’t meant a thing because Jay hit a girl.

It’s a disgusting double standard that we hold men and women to, y’all. We poke all kinds of fun at this situation, but Chris Brown had to publicly apologize do 52 weeks of domestic violence counseling. Where’s the call for Solange to enter counseling? Where’s her public apology? I’ll wait…

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