As 2013 winds down, I can’t help but this about this past year and how much I’ve learned. 2012 was about big change: graduating from Syracuse, moving across the country, adjusting to life in Texas, starting grad school, and learning the dynamics of a new job, department, and institution. I was hoping that 2013 would be a little less chaotic, but if that were the case, I probably wouldn’t be writing this post. Below are some of the things I’ve learned (or at least gained a better understanding of) in the past year.
I am so fortunate for the way I was raised.
I know I’ve blogged about this before, but I’m probably gonna be saying it til the day I die. The more I interact with other people, the more I am thankful for my family and my upbringing. As I have gotten to know people better, it continues to blow my mind that at 23, 25, 27, etc., people have no freaking idea who they are. Because they have no idea who they are, they’re willing to define themselves based on another people. This is not to say that investing yourself in other people is a bad thing–it’s something I should probably work on–but investing in other people and defining who you are based on other people are two different things, and there are a lot of people who fall prey to the latter.
Now, don’t get me wrong, would I love to have a man out in Texas?? HELL YAS! It’s been cold as shit; a cuddle buddy would be great! But I haven’t met anyone and that’s fine. Even if I had met someone, I would still be my own person. I will never understand losing yourself in someone else (I came very close once and will not let it happen again). My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and all of our close family friends are their own people within their relationships. I blame (and by blame, I mean thank) them for showing me that it’s not necessary to define yourself by another person: the right person is going to compliment me, not complete me. I’m 100% as it is.
You can’t win ’em all.
I do my best to play nice in the different facets of my life. With that being said, I never thought before I moved to Texas that I was coming here to make a million new best friends…in fact, if you follow my blog, you know that friendship is an odd topic for me. This year, I’ve tried especially hard to keep my nose to the ground and just do me (I mean, with a job search coming, I’m extra busy), yet I still hear all kinds of fun facts about myself from other people because they think a certain way about me both in Texas and back home. I don’t have the time or the energy to try to win everyone over, so I don’t know why people think I’d take the time to wish ill upon them. Either way, this year has taught me that even when you do try to put yourself out there and be kind, there are always gonna be people who smile in your face and talk shit the second you turn around. If you’re someone who doesn’t play those games, to you I say: keep doing you.
The South is just…different.
When I first moved to Lubbock, I thought I was living in the South. Nope. Nope nope nope. After interning in South Carolina, I have fallen in love with what the South really is. I’m not bashing Lubbock; there are elements of Southern Charm out here that are very similar to what I experienced in South Carolina, but it really isn’t the same. I feel in love with the green, hilly landscape, the Southern hospitality, the proximity to the ocean, and I can’t even lie…the food! As I’m gearing up for this job search, I am focusing my searching in the Southeast and on up the east coast because I would truly love to experience the south for the long term.
The Grand Plan for 2014
I’m not gonna bore you all with some “New Year, New Me!” bullshit…you’ll see plenty of that on social media platforms in the coming weeks. I will say there are some things that I’m planning on doing in the coming year. First and foremost, the number one goal is to get a job. Inherently tied to getting a job is the plan to graduate in May. Next, my dad and I are having a pound-for-pound challenge this coming year. I’ve already seen asshole comments about people hating seeing new people at the gym in January, and to those people I say: kiss my (too wide) ass. I have decided that I am not going to be overweight for my 25th birthday (in 2015), so I’m giving myself 18 months to lose some of dis ass. I am going to work on not sweating the small stuff this year because while this might come as a surprise, I tend to overthink things when I’m by myself. I am also going to make a strong effort to do a better job of keeping in touch with people in 2014. So for the short list: graduate, job, shed some pounds (but not awesomeness), stop overthinking, keep in touch with those I love.
…and of course, I’ll keep sharing my greatness with the blogging world this year!